Humor & awkward moments by Zero Dean, based on weird thoughts & real-life experiences.

Semi-colons

semi-colons-zero-dean

There are two; types of people in the world; those who know; how to use semi-colons properly; and those who don't.

Full disclosure:

Semicolons are one of the reasons why I break so many grammatical rules on purpose. Basically — to avoid drawing attention to the fact that despite going to college for six years — some of which involving English — I still can't use a semicolon worth a damn.

"Here is a lesson in creative writing. First rule: Do not use semicolons. They are transvestite hermaphrodites representing absolutely nothing. All they do is show you've been to college." - Kurt Vonnegut

For reference: Kurt Vonnegut's advice in A Man Without a Country not to use semicolons, because all they show is that you went to college. The video is The Lonely Island's "Semicolon" (NSFW language). I used four in the first line and still wouldn't bet on them.

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